Diego's Horror Corner: 80's

I'm pleased to present the long-awaited 1980's addition to Diego's Horror Corner by Diego Bergia


There's something special about the 80's, I spent the ages of 3 to to 12 in them. I was in the prime of my youth renting dusty VHS boxes filled with saturated red gore and gratuitous nudity shots. It was such a rush running back to a friends house to watch them cause my parents wouldn't let me get near anything rated R. The horror films early on in this decade were the 1970's continued, and you'll see nothing on my list is past 1984. There were lots of good one past that point, but to be honest near the end they got too campy.

MANIAC (1980)
In this urban slasher, Frank Zito is a serial killer stalks pretty women in grimey New York City. He uses their scalps to dress up female mannequins he keeps in his apartment, something about an abusive mother I think. This movie is pretty much perfect. Frank Zito is so effing amazing.

THE SHINING (1980)
I often wish David Lynch would make a horror movie, or Alejandro Jodorowski, Lars Van Trier just did. These guys have insane visions and I'd consider them artists before filmmakers. Anyway, if Stanley Kubrick never made The Shining, he'd be on that list too. Except he did make it. [note from Jill: agreed 100%]


SLEEPAWAY CAMP (1983)
If somebody hasn't already spoiled the ending for you yet, go out and rent it without telling anyone. It is the best summer camp slasher movie ever made, filled with great kills and amazing non-politically correct humour that disappeared in movies with the end of the 80's.

FRIDAY THE 13TH PART 4 - THE FINAL CHAPTER (1984)
Friday the 13th movies are like comfort food to me, like chicken soup and grilled cheese. I feel so cozy and safe watching them. This is the ultimate Friday movie to me because of a few things: Crispin Glover (The Man), Corey Feldman (right before Goonies) and Tom Savini (make-up and fx master). This is also near the end of the "strings" era, when the musical score was still awesome.

A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET (1984)
In my group of friends, you're either a Freddy man or a Jason man. I'm a Jason man, but there's no right answer. This first Nightmare movie is amazing and scary, nowhere near where the franchise went after a sequel or two. I would even go as far as saying that on it's own, it might be better than any Friday movie. The thing is, Friday movies are solid 1 through 6. Nightmare I'll only give you 1 though 3. That's basically why I'm a Jason man.


HONORABLE MENTIONS:
THE THING, FRIDAY 1, POLTERGEIST, THE BURNING, DAY OF THE DEAD, DEMONS, THE HITCHER.

ending soon- 3D film fest

3D films are experiencing a rebirth with the success of Up and a wagonload of animated flicks following suit. Why not see classics the same way? Canada's oldest and greatest theatre, The Fox, began it's 3D Film Fest on the 17th with House of Wax and Friday the 13th. With a choice selection of movies, there's no reason not to check one out after a picnic in the Beaches.

If you haven't caught the first few days, here's the schedule. There's still hope!

Love is in the air.

On my way to work yesterday morning I passed Central Technical School at Bathurst and Harbord. The big, sturdy, medievalesque high school has got to be among my favorite downtown landmarks. For one, it was the primary setting for the movie Class of 1984, which incase you haven't seen it, is a perfect 1980's punk gang flick. It features a live performance by Hamilton's Teenage Head and plenty of ridiculous melodramatic violence. Two, the building is rumored to have derelict underground tunnels, cool right? According to alumni one was used as an artillery range in World War 1. Lastly, my third and final fancy for Central Tech is the students that dominate my neighborhood. The constant exposure to teen shenanigans right outside my window during lunch, before and after class. The kids are pretty hilarious and in a small way, it kind of keeps me young. Incidentally, as I walked by the school yesterday and watched as two young lovers no more than 16, gaze into each others eyes, totally engrossed and hopeless, I was overwhelmed by memories of spring flings past. Especially in Canada, after a long winter, spring is a special time of year. Truly, love is in the air Toronto, and some of you may have already caught the bug. 

So for those of you looking to get romantic this season, we recommend Hernando's Hideaway. A quaint little tex-mex basement restaurant just south of Wellesley and Yonge. We had the california salad, the chicken chimichangas and a couple of margaritas. The bill was reasonable, the food amazing and the atmosphere casual with a touch of gimmicky fun. Furthermore (and this is a big one) the lighting is perfect for date dining. Here's a look at what we ordered.

The entrance sign boasts "The Best Margaritas In Town"... I might even agree with them.

Although we didn't have a chance to test them, we're guessing the fajitas for two would be an appropriate order.

Pharrell, I ain't trying to kill your mood but I can do the Star Trek sign.

I am by no means a trekkie, although a child of the 90's could hardly escape the prime time takeover of The Next Generation. Because of it's sheer frequency, I came to somwhat begrudge the show. Whereas it's predecessor, with that charmingly outdated 60's sci-fi vibe was always a real treat as a kid, and still holds true today. Throughout childhood my dad was commonly the king of the remote around the house, and was much more amused by cartoons and sports then science fiction. Consequently, I was spared the agony of the repetitive adventures of Enterprise-D. But not Jillian, that's right, my fellow ghosty was brought up in a full fledged nerd lair... I'm exaggerating totally, her pop is not one of those guys that dress up as a Klingon for conventions, but I'm pretty sure he never missed an episode. Maybe we can even accredit some of Jillian's Vulcan-esque intelligence to her dad's valuable influence (a little Star Trek fanaticism never hurt anyone). With all that said, and Jillian out gallivanting around Montreal this weekend, I felt it my duty to watch and report on the new Star Trek movie in theaters today on behalf of Miss Elizabeth's Ghost. The verdict? Nailed it! A total credit to the Star Trek franchise, special effects, adventure, comedy and cast, the movie had it all. Furthermore, I was delighted to see Leonard Nimoy back in full glory. Typically, I would rate the whole experience a 10, if it weren't for the fact that Jillian was absent in sharing my Junior Mints and Diet Coke...

Maybe if you're lucky you'll get a full review from the spawn of trekky herself, after she's had a chance to see it on the big screen... Live long and prosper and beam me up Scotty. I'm out.

You are tearing me apart, Lisa!

My friend Evan recently got the chance to interview the great Tommy Wiseau, mastermind behind cult film The Room. I still haven't heard of screenings in the great city of Toronto and was wondering if anyone wanted to help put one together?

Here is the interview. It's a must-read, as Wiseau gives us insight into the psychology of The Room and explains his references to Tennessee Williams. Sheer brilliance. 

3, 2, 1, comin in with a bang.

Here we are, the last week of March. In like a lion, out like a lamb? Well, I've got my fingers crossed. Although, this spring does seem less exciting than last. Maybe it's because last year around this time I was beginning to plot out The 10 Deep Canadian Skateboard Tour with my friend German Nieves and the good folks at snkrbox. Or maybe I'm just a bit envious of the team, who crashed San Fransisco earlier this month.


German hit me with an email this morning regarding said jaunt to SF. All sour grapes aside, they've put together a tight promo video and some choice flicks. Check out Tony Montgomery, Daniel Kim, Jamal Smith, Tommy Wisdom and The Big Germ skating the Bay Area in style at Steelo Hero.

As a segway, I'll introduce this edition of Album of the Week: A classic by 1990's gangster rappers RBL Posse, hailing from Hunters Point, San Fransisco, titled A Lesson to Be Learned. Their first release, Don't Give Me No Bammer is a Summertime Anthem for us ghosts. Now, listen to it and visualize stooping with a cold Mill St. in July... We're almost there Toronto.

Ill-fated.

I'm having a really bad day. It all started as I began to prepare a cheese omelet for breakfast and in an attempt to season the thing, I knocked over a shaker of salt. This caused a sudden frantic uproar from my mother (who was present during the mishap via speakerphone), extraneously recalling an indoor umbrella opening incident, 2 weeks prior. Simultaneously, a black cat crossed my path, as I walked under a ladder that was in the shape of a horseshoe, positioned in an upside down U. In horror, I ran out of the kitchen into the bedroom slamming the door behind, causing a quake to disturb the circular hall mirror as it fell from it's hook and shattered to the floor. I knocked on wood for like an hour then broke a wishbone. However, I'm still feeling cursed. I can't help but credit the whole ordeal to today's date, but that's just a bunch of superstitious hogwash...



Incidentally, at midnight yesterday evening, I went to see the new Friday The 13th movie at the AMC Theater in Dundas Square. I'll only say this: there were 13 deaths, 3 sets of breasts and you won't be mad at it.

Diego's Horror Corner

THE 70s
The 70s is my favourite decade by far, there's a certain dirty gritty gross feeling to the movies that came out.
I love the color of the film, the grain, and the total lack of political correctness in them.
Also, since there are so many of them, i had to add an honorable mention list (more late rental fees for you to pay).
One thing you may have noticed is that more than half of these movies have been remade recently. Don't think for a second you should overlook these originals.



















LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT - 1972
This is Wes Craven's first movie (not including a porn documentary he did with future Friday the 13th dir. Sean S. Cunningham).
Two 17 year-old girls are off to Manhattan for a Bloodlust concert, while trying to score some weed they're kidnapped, tortured, and killed by a group of Mansonesque escaped cons.
This is just the beginning. Last House is very mean spirited, but balanced with the slapstick of two cops, and a semi-controversial pissing on demand scene.



















DON'T LOOK IN THE BASEMENT - 1973
Even my closest friends who love horror movies can't get with this one. It's funny what some people can call cheesy I call genius. Dr. Stephens runs a secluded asylum in the middle of the woods, that gets taken over by its inmates.
And the inmates are the best cast of characters in any movie ever.

Sgt Jaffee - A freak hallucinating vietnam vet who is constantly waging his own private war.
Sam - A big mean looking black dude who acts childlike because of a lobotomy. He likes to play with his boats, suck lollipops and go on missions with Sgt Jaffee.
Harriet - A psychotic girl obsessed with protecting her baby (a scruffy looking doll).
Danny - An annoying ginger perm who races around the place laughing and irritating everyone when hes not trying to steal Harriet's baby.
Allyson - A raging Nymphomaniac who's just looking for love…"Come on! I do taste like strawberries! Taste me"!
Mrs. Callingham - a cackling, poetry spouting, profit of doom old lady who is plagued by hallucinations.
Judge Cameron - Yes, he thinks he's a real judge, and is encouraged by Dr Stephens to beat out his inner conflict by chopping at tree trunks with an axe.

One of my favourite movies of all time.



















DERANGED - 1974
Go figure, two movies that made my top five were inspired by Ed Gein. This one was filmed in Ontario, not Texas, and is a more real life depiction of him.
"Ezra Cobb" is a momma's boy who's left on his own with his beloved mothers passing. So much, he digs her up and brings her home. He then digs up fresh graves and sometimes uses fresh meat to replenish his mothers decaying skin. Ezra then begins to see other uses for whats left over from his dig ups including furnishing and decorations.



















THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE - 1974
Not much to say about this Ed Gein one, it did a lot better for itself that's for sure. Let director Tobe Hooper explain it:
"It's a film about meat, about people who have gone beyond dealing with animal meat and rats and dogs and cats, Crazy retarded people going beyond the line between animal and human."
In my top 3 horor movies of all time (with Don't Look in the Basement and Dawn).



















DAWN OF THE DEAD - 1978
I've fantisized about being stuck in a mall with 3 or 4 friends, breaking into the hunting shops for guns, gathering food, playing at the arcade... This is the sequel to Night of the Living Dead if you didn't know, and my favourite in the Dead Trilogy.

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

THE HILLS HAVE EYES , HALLOWEEN, TOOLBOX MURDERS, TOURIST TRAP, THE BROOD.

Crime Classics

We haven't been to see Notorious yet but in the meantime, I've been enjoying City of God's Son: a beat opera story of 3 friends in the hood. Nas, Jay Z and Ghostface lead the tale, which also boasts some of our favourite people: Ghostface, Biggie, Raekwon, Samuel L. Jackson, Delroy Lindo, Laurence Fishburne and Joe Bataan. This isn't one of your mum's books on tape.

The website is phenomenal, the story infectious, and the outcome is so intriguing, I plan to make a trip down to the Rotten Apple to see the installation. Kenzo Digital will be marrying several mediums: 

"creating a new form of Cinema, Theater, and Opera in an outside gallery space in NY's Chelsea art district. There, the listener will be able to experience COGS in the form it was initially intended, as a psychedelic abstract combination of visual and audio sensory over stimulation and deprivation in a unique outdoor setting."

Peep the trailer, over and over again and download the project!

(love what they did to that Kool G track)

Who's down for a roadtrip this summer?

Diego's Horror Corner

One day when i was 7 or 8, my mom walked in on me in the bathroom and started freaking out. I was stabbing a hard-boiled egg over and over with a cocktail sword yelling "DIE!!!...DIE!!!..". It's pretty understandable why it was so uneasy to her, thinking back on it now it almost sounds serial killer. But what she didn't know is that I had just painted a Jason mask on the egg, and I was pretending to be Tommy Jarvis from the end of Friday the 13th part 4. That's all.

This is the first of five installments, I will be talking about my top 5 favorite horror movies from each decade beginning with the 60's.
Enjoy.

-Diego

***

THE 60'S

This is as old-school as i really like to get. I love slasher films mostly, gritty gross feeling stuff.
Anything before the 1960's doesn't really do it for me.

















PSYCHO - 1960
I won't be posting too many "classics" on my lists, but Psycho deserves being here. It holds up incredibly, Alfred Hitchcock was a master.
Just see it.

















WHAT EVER HAPPENED TO BABY JANE? - 1962
People could argue this being a horror movie, but it really gets under my skin. Bette Davis and Joan Crawford play a pair of sisters who were once child actresses. Now they're grown up share and a home together, one of them is totally insane.

















TWO THOUSAND MANIACS! - 1964
Hershell Gordon Lewis is the Godfather of gore. In this second installment of the Blood Trilogy, two carloads of teenagers drive through the redneck southern town of Pleasant Valley. To their surprise, there is a celebration about to begin. They stick around for the party.

















REPULSION - 1965
Roman Polanski isn't allowed in the U.S.A. anymore. This is his first english language film, about a sexually repressed girl who slowly loses her mind over the course of a weekend, with homicidal results.

















NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD - 1968
George A. Romero invented the zombie movie with this one, and pretty much set the standard for modern horror films.
Slow zombies, the way they should be.

You might as well live.

Our friend Simon Ennis directed this really hilarious mean-spirited comedy called, You Might As Well Live starring Michael Madsen and Joshua Peace.

I was lucky enough to view this unhinged Canadian gem at a test screening a couple of months ago and tomorrow I'll see the finished production with cast and crew.

It's scheduled to feature in the Slamdance Film Festive '09 (which is the more edgy rival of the now hollywood-ized Sundance). Check out the website HERE.